I’ve recently become a father again. I now have two boys. It’s been bliss: falling in love at first sight, blocking out the entire world and focusing on the new life I helped create. No description in existence does the experience justice.
And yet, a few weeks later, I had to open the door and welcome all my other responsibilities back.
It’s been hard.
So hard.
Harder than I imagined it would be.
It’s not the baby, or our eldest child, or my job, or being a partner. It’s everything thrown in together. I’ve found it constantly overwhelming. Add to that a dose of sleep deprivation, and I’ve felt at a loss about how to regain control of my life.
So, what do I do?
I focus on one thing.
No matter how chaotic my day is, I swipe at least two small blocks of time and distribute them evenly between my boys. I cuddle the baby and read him books. I build Legos with my eldest son and play-fight with him.
And that’s what guides me forward, what I hang on to, the one thing I end the day knowing for certain I got right. Because when is hanging out with your kids ever not right?
Life with two kids has been a tough adjustment. I continue to snatch gasps of air as my head winks above the water every once in a while. I feel overwhelmed, that I’m failing, that I’ve taken on too much. But when I shift my attention to my boys, I leave everything else behind. All that exists is them. And as long as I can do that, I know there is light at the end of the tunnel.
If you do one thing today, hang out with your kids. Leave everything else by the door. Exist in a space where there is only room for this: your children and your shared attention.
Do this right now.
You won’t regret it.